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so, i went 2 my va cliinc today, mostly a regular checkup, refill meds, etc. anyway, i finally remembered to mention me almost passin out at times, couple while driving, but never had ...yet. he then checked my breathing, heart, fely where they did my fusion of my neck, movements, pain level when i moved arms, neck. anyway, he told me he was ordering a mri on my brain, also neck, to check an see if my fusion was healing right, an test on my heart. he was really concerned about it, which is good , not knockin that.
i promised my wife that i would requst to see the mental doc, that i was starting get out of hand at times, dreams, night sweats are gettin real bad. couple days back, i found myself in the backyard, gun in hand, scared the hell outta wife now. thinkin about moving my guns, least a few anyway.
21 yrs. ago, was a soldier who did his job, never questioned any orders..now..fast forward 21 yrs., still a soldier at heart as we all are, but have to make pain meds everyday just to sota function without pain, an takes everything i got at times to remember what i was thinkin in my head to say., have to keep a pocket notebook with me, so i can remember what im supposed to do....
i ramblin, sorry, this took around 30 mins to write, ....guessin im sayin that this stuff startin to scare me a lil, im prob just over thinkin, but, i'll be 42 in august....an messed up to the point that doc told me my body was in the shape of a 70 yr. old.
, an now this....
so again for ramblin....
edit: look over the mispellin plz, i can't type as fast as im thinkin....

Haze bro you hang in there ,we fought the war now lets win the battle Iam sending you a personal message in your mailbox read it and get back with me ,ptsd will lie to you and rob you from life ,its real and most people on this forum seems to be fighting this including myself so those people and myself also carry your burden because you are one of us ,so haze fight with all you have ,fight for a life again my friend just as you did when you was younger .

Haze ,check this out also/ www.soldiersheart.net ,you will have to type it in I could not get it to copy on this site.

went 2 the va again last wednesday for pt on my neck, also did a mri on my brain ...2 different things going on there.anyway, i met up with the therapists , he sat me down an told me that they still could'nt do anything, that last months xray showed no real healing yet, which he said that it should be healing by now...got a apointment with neuro doc in aug.

Keep me informed if ya dont mind

Yea, like animal said keep us in the loop. I don't post as much as I used to but I do still lurk.

get your ass in va psy. ward, and stay as long as you can.? THEY WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU AND YOUR FAMILY, ITS THE LAW.

update:
well, surgery on neck didn't work. one dics is coming out(freaky xray, by the way), the other is smashed or collasping(spelling?), the va doc ( a new one, which i like ) said he wasn't quilfied to do it.( least he was honest) so they sent me to a outside doc, the plan is to replace the 2 damaged dics , an now another, maybe 1 more for a total of 3 or 4 , depending how the last one looks. add plates, screws, maybe fencing, rods. surgery probably in may or june. yesterday i seen a pain mangement feller at my va clinic. he asked alot of questions, an reeled that id asked for mental help..lond story short mental health called me 2day..i got a 40 min interview in the morning over the phone.called a core assessment interview..whatever that is...so yesterdays appointment turned out to be a good thing. got more done in 1hr. than i've had done in a yr. it seems.
i got more to tell ya'll on my claims, but fingers are going numb. take care all.

Haze ,hope you are doing ok you got my number if ya ever need a ear and sounds great you are making some ground up hope they get ya fixed up bro ,let me know if they get ya in a program also cause Iam looking at round 2 myself be good to get in at same time if you go to lexington .

Shinseki was on one of those political shows today (3-24-2013). He stated if you were in combat you have PTSD .